My Hopes, Memories and Dreams

Free Falling






free falling

through the hollow

finger tips straining

desperately, to hold on…

…to what?

That certainty that alludes me…?

one can not grasp that

which is not in reach

I invoke the screams of Alice

beckoned further down the spiral

by the Darkness

that is

my Rabbit Hole

as every nerve cell in my being

chooses to coagulate in my chest

pelting, fruitlessly

like stone cold hail

against the window to my soul

too numb to retaliate


from the ravishing anxieties

that appear to have swallowed whole

the gravity


my being


11 responses

  1. A very emotional and scary piece of writing, Colleen. I could feel the fall into the hole; very good.

    January 25, 2011 at 10:38 am

  2. Hi Paul, I’m pleased you liked it. Thanks for saying so…

    January 25, 2011 at 10:45 am

  3. An excellent reading too. I don’t know why I missed that the first time.

    January 26, 2011 at 4:47 am

    • Haha ! I added it after your first visit ! I don’t like hearing the sound of my own voice (and the Aussie drawl) but I was wondering if readers might appreciate it =)

      January 26, 2011 at 7:37 am

  4. Colleen,
    Another heart-wrencher.
    You know what, I think you should write fiction for high schoolers, maybe even tamped-down versions for middle schoolers. Your experiences, your voice and survival instincts could be an inspiration to so many young people who are suffering as you did.You could share your wisdom.
    Just a thought…

    January 26, 2011 at 2:12 pm

  5. Thanks so much for your supportive words Pam ! I really mean that. You have no idea how heart-warming it is to hear such lovely feedback from my readers/friends on the other side of the world ! I would love to write more and often have that inner conversation with myself about which direction I could take, and you are spot on…writing for teens makes SO much sense to me given my own tapestry of experience and that of the teenagers I now advocate for in the child welfare system. I guess its a matter of focusing on the strengths I do possess and just doing it !!!! Early next week I am spending two days on the “Sunshine Coast” for some rest and relaxation…(I’ll post some photos on Facebook…it’s glorious there )….maybe I will seek some inspiration whilst I am there unwinding !

    Thanks again for your kindness =) xox

    January 26, 2011 at 3:30 pm

  6. Hi dear friend!

    I hope that you are fine!
    Your poem is interesting.The picture makes me think at the nightmares that we have it sometimes.
    Even a poem a bit black is an art i think! 😉

    Have a great day!

    February 4, 2011 at 2:32 am

    • Hi Alina, we are all well and safe here in Cairns. Glad you appreciated my poem. Hope you are well too !

      February 5, 2011 at 7:42 am

  7. Colleen, I am treading backwards to find new treasures to explore on your blog… this is a perfect gem that once again, speaks to my inner being… to the girl still hoping to avoid the fall. And knowing it’s her only way out…

    February 21, 2011 at 7:31 am

    • Hi April, thanks so much ! It’s always a pleasure to hear that words written from the inside, out…do resonate with others.

      March 6, 2011 at 3:12 pm

  8. “I invoke the screams of Alice

    beckoned further down the spiral

    by the Darkness

    that is

    my Rabbit Hole”
    obsessed with Alice references.
    Nice piece!!

    February 26, 2011 at 4:35 am

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